Candy Man
by xxLunaTerraxx
Summary: The Warden discovers the joy of candy.


**Authors Notation: **I was sitting in the movie theater a few days ago eating ma candy when this fluffy idea came into my head. Also this is slight Jared/Warden so, if one no liking, no looking. I don't tolerate flamers, especially those who have been warned beforehand on what's ahead. :[

Also for those who have not seen "No Strings Attached" or "Black Swan", HIGHLY recommend both of them. :) For some reason me, my mother and my best friend are the only perverts in this town; no one else was dying laughing during "No Strings Attached". It's all good though, we had fun. XD

**Disclaimer: **Do not own the rights to Superjail, nor do I to those wonderful little candies called Warheads. I'm kinda wondering why I don't have any in the house to eat though. =\

**Candy Man**

Jared couldn't help but have his whole body shake as he made his way to The Warden's office. The head of Superjail had paged him moments before saying he needed his presence there as soon as possible. Since it seemed like he hadn't contacted anyone else, Jared could only conclude it had something to do with Superjail's budget, so he had collected up as much of the paper work he could carry and was now making he way into the lions den. Silently Jared hoped that, whatever The Warden wanted, wouldn't cause them to go too much into the red this month.

Finally making it to the single door that he knew would lead him to his proverbial death by numbers, Jared took in a deep breath before opening said door and sealing his fate by closing it tightly behind him. He was slightly taken aback by the sight before him: an empty office with The Warden no where to be found. As if on cue though, The Warden suddenly appeared right next to him causing Jared to squeal in fright before littering the area around them with office papers.

"Hello Jared, so glad you could make it. Quickly come with me, there's something you just **have** to see!"

With speed that was humanly impossible, The Warden drug Jared toward his office desk, placing him directly in front of it, before leaping over in and depositing himself in the chair behind it. Jared watched with bated breath as he opened up one of the many drawers adoring the piece of furniture and, after digging around in it for a good long while, produced a large bag of, what looked to be, colorful marbles.

Knowing The Warden, Jared was extremely terrified as to what exactly those little balls of color really were but, unfortunately, his curiosity got the better of him. "What exactly are those things, Sir?"

The Warden's mouth quickly broke into his trademark tooth-gaped grin. "Why Jared, these are no doubt the most satisfying, mouth watering, lip puckering candies of all time! Warheads!"

His body shaking from head to toe had stopped, but Jared was still wary as to exactly why The Warden had called him here. "Warheads, Sir?'

The Warden continued to smile as he proceeded to plop a few of the so called Warheads into his mouth. "Yes Jared, Warheads. They are the tricksters of candy. You see, when you first put them into your mouth they explode into a giant cloud of sour that truly feels like a warhead is going off in your head! Then they quickly disguise themselves in a cloak of sweetness that lulls you into a false sense of security so, when you put another one in, the explosion of sour is even better than the first time!"

Jared honestly couldn't remember the last time The Warden was so excited about something. Quite possibly when he announced D.L Diamond was coming to Superjail, but he couldn't be sure.

Sparks were coming out of The Warden's ears as he continued to shovel the colorful candy into his awaiting mouth. "Here Jared, you simply **must** try some. Trust me when I say your life just isn't complete until you've had a Warhead!"

Before Jared could protest otherwise, The Warden had picked out a nice green colored one and threw it toward Jared's small form. Either by shear luck, or because The Warden had been practicing him aim in his spare time, said candy found it's way straight into Jared gaping mouth, the force of the impact causing him to skid clear across the floor.

After a moment of collecting himself and letting his tongue coast over the new object, Jared couldn't help but smile some and release a satisfied noise from deep in his throat. "Why Warden, these things really are delicious!"

The Warden chuckled and smiled triumphantly at Jared's reaction. "Why of course they are Jared, would I ever steer you wrong?" Pulling out another Warhead candy piece, The Warden began studying it intently while twirling it between his thumb and index finger. "Such a wonder you are my little friend. If only there was a way to make such a splendiferous candy into something even **more** spectacular tasting."

Jared watched with new found anxiety as The Warden's eyes began coasting between himself and the small sour candy he was talking to. Suddenly The Warden snapped his fingers as a light bulb appeared over his head, signaling that some sort of idea had formed.

"Jared, come over here for a moment."

All of the worry that had left Jared's body earlier had suddenly come rushing back at that one statement. "Sir?"

The Warden heaved an exasperated sigh before rolling his eyes at Jared's constant questioning. "Did I mumble or something? I said come over here now Jared!"

Squeaking at the rise in The Warden's voice, Jared quickly hurried himself over to where he was pointing. He began ringing his small hands together in nervousness as The Warden leaned back in his chair and gave himself a serious once over, like he was contemplating that whatever he was about it do was a good idea or not.

Seemingly deciding that everything was a go, The Warden quickly scooped up little Jared and placed his behind right atop of his desk. Before whatever question could make it from Jared's brain to his mouth, The Warden placed the candy he had been holding into his own mouth before covering Jared's mouth with his own.

Jared's eyes almost fell from his head and rolled across the carpet floor when The Warden's thin lips pressed against his. A tight grip on his chin kept him from pulling away though and the growing sensation of being encased in a fog made him seriously doubt his ability to do so even without The Warden's vice-grip.

Suddenly Jared became very aware of something wet probing at his tightly closed lips. His body seemed to be totally disconnected from his brain at this point for, without the slightest hint of hesitation, his mouth quickly opened allowing The Warden's tongue to fully penetrate the orifice.

He felt a slight jolt go through his whole body as the Warhead that The Warden placed in his mouth earlier joined in on their little tongue battle. Jared couldn't stop as a moan rose from deep in his chest while his eyes rolled to the back of his head in response to the swirling flavors that were exploding in his mouth. It was a combination of sweet, sour apple, herbal and a flavor that seemed to belong to The Warden alone. Jared soon couldn't help it as one of his hands wandered upwards and tangled itself tightly into whatever hair that wasn't covered up by The Warden's purple top hat. In contrast, The Warden's grip on Jared's chin loosened only to allow his fingers to begin lightly stroking the sensitive juncture below ones ear.

The exploration of each others flavors lasted only until the candy they were sharing between them shriveled down into nothing, a tiny lingering hint of acidity the only indication there was ever anything there. Jared almost whimpered at the sudden loss of contact as The Warden suddenly retreated and leaned back in his chair once again, a thoughtful look set deep in his features. He carefully ran his tongue along the inside of his mouth before smacking his lightly swollen lips together.

"Interesting. Not quite the oomph I was looking for, but I think it gives us something to work with."

Brandishing his cane, Warden quickly jumped to his feet and briskly made his way over to the office door. "Come Jared, I believe the good Doctor has some new scientific advancements for Superjail he wants us to look at."

Jared stayed rooted to his spot on the desk for a few seconds after The Warden had left. Luckily he was able to snap himself out of it and follow The Warden out the door before he grew too impatient, though not before he grabbed some of the left over Warheads and stuffed them into his pockets. He had a feeling he could find a reason to get Warden to experiment with them again later.

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I don't know why but I could totally see Warden getting all obsessed over something so silly as candy and Jared somehow getting wrangled into said obsession. XD

I feel bad for Jared though, Warden gets him all hot and bothered only to skip away like nothing happened. Lol! Don't worry Jared, you'll have your day soon. ;)


End file.
